Author: karan

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Unsporting should be un-Australian

Not for the Australian cricket team, not yet.

The incident: A. B. de Villiers, third ball of the second over, Australia v South Africa, 20-20 match, gets a Tait special in his gut, edging off his bat. In pain, he keels over and inadvertantly hits the stumps, out hit-wicket.

The man is doubled over in pain on the grass, and the Australian team? Celebrating away, meters from the man.

This is an image that will linger in my mind for a while yet – that the disgusting sporting behaviour continues, that not a man on the Australian team took a second to ask that de Villiers was ok.

Disgusting.

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Movies 2009

Last year I did a preview of the 2008 movies, and ended up misreading half of them (21 is not a heist movie, Cloverfield was the most bleh since the second Matrix, and let’s not even talk about The Forbidden Kingdom – not to mention the fact that I missed entirely the second half of the year), but let’s charge ahead for what 2009 promises!

  • Akira – A live action remake of Akira set in ‘New Manhattan’. I fear it, and yet… (part 1 is scheduled for mid-year)
  • Fast & Furious – look, I’m a sucker for this kind of stuff. It will probably be awful, but a car chase is a car chase, and F&F is one long car chase. (trailer)
  • Them – new movie by Edgar Wright, director of Sean of the Dead and Hot Fuzz. Just going on form here.
  • Rachel Getting Married – Anne Hathaway is the slightly messed up sister of the bride, in a movie widely tipped for Oscars. One for the serious column.
  • Duplicity – hang about, is this a remake of Mr & Mrs Smith? Or a Julia Roberts movie I could actually like? Clive Owen and Julia Roberts are ex-spies moving to the corporate world, and… just watch the trailer.
  • The Brothers Bloom – Adrien Brody and Rachel Weisz in a fun looking flick about a pair of conmen (Mark Ruffalo – Just Like Heaven – and Brody) trying to run a scam on an heiress (Weisz). Also stars Rinko Kikuchi (of Babel fame) as a slightly crazy explosives expert. (trailer)
  • Underworld 3: Rise of the Lycans – this is a un-recommendation. There is no Kate Beckinsale.
  • The International – Clive Owen and Naomi Watts in this rather timely action-thriller set in an international bank. Practically mandatory viewing for me (trailer).
  • The Spirit – Samuel L Jackson headlines in this film directed by 300‘s Frank Miller, in a visual style reminiscient of Sin City. Broad appeal is questionable, but does look damn good – although reviews are panning it. (trailer, and un-trailer – read the text!)
  • Sherlock Holmes – Guy Ritchie directs Robert Downey Jr (Iron Man) and Jude Law (er… Alfie? Talented Mr Ripley?) in what one can only hope is the Batman Begins-isation of the classic detective stories.
  • Coraline – weird little animation based on a story by Neil Gaiman, meaning it’s going to be dark, quietly funny and something you never quite know where it goes next. (site, trailer)
  • Transformers 2: Revenge of the Fallen – yes, I didn’t like Transformers all that much in 2007, but you’ve got to give them another chance, right? And who can say no to Megan Fox, right? (due in June)
  • Inglorious Basterds – Taratino’s long-awaited misspelt WWII flick with Brad Pitt and Mike Myers, which is definitely in the not-to-be-missed column. (due August)
  • Monsters vs Aliens – new Dreamworks animation that looks like it might in fact be targeted at older folk. Aliens invade Earth, and we have monsters to fight back. (trailer)
  • Avatar – I’m just intrigued by James Cameron’s return to sci-fi, teaming with Sigourney Weaver (both from Aliens). (teaser trailer)
  • The Class – French movie about a bunch of disadvantaged kids in a class. Rave reviews and genuine looking acting looks intriguing. (trailer)
  • Wolverine – Let’s see what Hugh Jackman can do by himself. I’m hoping this salvages the X-Men series somewhat, as the co-ordinated jumpsuits of the third were just a bit… camp. (due May – trailer)
  • Watchmen – I know nothing of the comics, but this certainly looks promising. (trailer)
  • Star Trek – J J Abrams takes on the ultimate geek series. Now, I’m no trekkie, and Abrams hasn’t exactly got a movie track record, but he could salvage the appeal for this just based on the trailer. Now if only Spock didn’t look so much like Sylar… (trailer)
  • Public Enemies – I’m just going on names here – Johnny Depp, Christian Bale and Michael Mann (director of Miami Vice) in a crime story set in the (first) Great Depression sounds fairly intriguing to me.
  • Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince – a necessary mention, though this was supposed to be a 2008 film. The second last in the series, and probably the one with the best title and harshest conclusion. (trailer)
  • Revolutionary Road – Kate Winslet and Leo Di Caprio reunited, with Kate looking gorgeous, and Leo having learnt how to act. Will be a quiet one but should be a good movie. (trailer)
  • Nottingham – Russell Crowe v Russell Crowe, directed by Ridley Scott. Yes, Russell Crowe in a double role, as both Robin Hood and the Sherrif. How this is going to work is beyond me.
  • Up – Pixar’s next release is the story of a 78 year old balloon salesman who lifts his house up with balloons. What this ultimately leads to is unrevealed, but since it’s Pixar it’s got to be worth a look, right? (trailer)
  • Notorious – Biggie Smalls, B.I.G., the biggest name in rap in the 90s bar Tupac Shakur, gets a biopic. Let’s say it’ll be a very specific film and the target audience is pretty clearly identified, but it’s certainly one for me. (trailer)
  • Astro Boy – ASTRO BOY DOES NOT WEAR A SHIRT. (trailer)
  • Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun-Li – it’s the halfie chick from Smallville as our favorite Street Fighter! Apart from the part where she looks nothing at all like Chun-Li (where are the thighs?!), this could be… decent? (trailer)
  • The Code – Morgan Freeman, Antonio Banderas, guns, theives, heist, etc. (poster)
  • Push – Dakota Fanning is growing up, but she’s keeping her strange looks. This movie seems to be a bit like Jumper, but without angsty-pants Christensen. (trailer)
  • Necessary mentions you can google yourself: Terminator Salvation, Where the Wild Things Are, Land of the Lost, Angels and Demons (Tom Hanks returns in the se-/pre-quel to The Da Vinci Code), Year One (Jack Black), The Taking of Pelham 123 (Travolta).

There are plenty of others to come, and it may be that I need to revisit this list halfway through the year to rejig it, but that should be a good start to the proceedings. There’s enough sequelism to keep the year churning, but there’s enough outside of that to make it a decent year.

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My Favourite Bushisms

As we approach January 20, we know that the people who will miss GWB the most is clearly the comedians, particularly when he’s the source of endless quality quotes – here’s a choice list of a few as collected by the AP:

  • “I know the human being and fish can coexist peacefully.” – September 2000
  • “Rarely is the question asked, is our children learning?” – January 2000
  • “There’s no doubt in my mind, not one doubt in my mind, that we will fail.” – Oct. 4, 2001
  • “There’s an old saying in Tennessee – I know it’s in Texas, probably in Tennessee – that says, fool me once, shame on… shame on you. Fool me… you can’t get fooled again.” – Sept. 17, 2002
  • “Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we.” – Aug. 5, 2004
  • “We look forward to hearing your vision, so we can more better do our job.” – Sept. 20, 2005
  • “It was not always a given that the United States and America would have a close relationship. After all, 60 years we were at war 60 years ago we were at war.” – June 29, 2006, speaking with Japanese PM Junichiro Koizumi
  • “Make no mistake about it, I understand how tough it is, sir. I talk to families who die.” – Dec. 7, 2006
  • “Thank you, Your Holiness. Awesome speech.” – April 16, 2008, to the Pope
  • “I remember meeting a mother of a child who was abducted by the North Koreans right here in the Oval Office.” – June 26, 2008
  • “This thaw… took a while to thaw, it’s going to take a while to unthaw.” – Oct. 20, 2008, talking about the frozen credit market.

Here’s hoping some other character appears to make up for the lack of Bush or Palin on the world stage.

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Hola 2009

Happy New Year, everyone!

It’s scary to think it’s now been 9 years since the tick of the clock to 2000. To think, I had so many plans back then… that… er… mostly involved… ok, so I can’t remember a single one of those plans for the life of me, but I think they mostly involved getting through school and having a car. That’s me, ambitious as all heck.

So, er, here’s to more plans! Or plain ol’ spontaneity, as the case may well be.

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Movie Review: Slumdog Millionaire

Slumdog Millionaire: Jamal, a slum kid done good, is just trying to get back with his girl. The universe seems to have other plans for him, and it involves appearing on the Indian Who Wants to be a Millionaire? – where, despite his slum upbringing, he knows a streak of answers. This however makes the host suspicious, and he calls the cops to take him away for a shake-down.

A film adaptation of a novel, Q & A by Vikas Swarup, Slumdog Millionaire is up for serious Oscar contention. Directed by Danny Boyle (Trainspotting), it’s little wonder a story like this is being considered a dark horse for Best Picture. Timelines are interspersed, but each subtly clear and distinct, though it does like to meander. Told mostly in English, the plot manages to keep its thread, though there are moments of credulity that the suspension of disbelief is required to overcome. Scenes of the slums can be confronting, and occasionally it appears to be exaggerated to make the point, but it’s all in there, and then some.

Much of the cast appear to be first-timers or near-unknowns, with the exception of the host (Anil Kapoor, former Bollywood heart-throb), and the police detective (Irfan Khan, last seen by me in The Namesake a week ago), who both fill their roles admirably. The newcomers and child actors do well, though not without the occasional moment of heavy-handed direction.

Stylistically told, well acted and with a brilliant soundtrack by A. R. Rahman (featuring M.I.A.), Slumdog Millionaire should definitely surprise. ★★★★

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Movie Review: Quickie Edition IX

Tropic Thunder: The line between action movie and spoof action flick blurs wildly in this, though it pulls out just ahead in the spoof column. I suppose it’s only a commentary of our times when you wonder whether the product placement in this is intentional or whether it’s there to be parodied. While there aren’t any stand-out performances, the movie does chug along nicely enough, and it’s worth a few laughs. ★★★

Dhrona: Zero out of Five. Zip, zilch, nada. No redeeming features what. so. ever.

(I mean, if you can make Priyanka Chopra look frumpy, you’re most certainly doing it wrong.)

Australia: Australia, the country, deserves better than this, if only because there is such talent that it could have had better. Australia tells the story of Lady Sarah Ashley, newly arrived in the Territory to try to sell off a cattle ranch, Faraway Downs. A series of unfortunate events sees her staying, and a love story, a tale of hardship and a snippet of war are all told in the backdrop of early World War II Darwin.

You know it’s an “epic” because (a) the running time is 2 hours and 40 minutes (interval? what interval?) and there’s at least three or four points throughout that you think “Is this the end yet?” (at least before checking your watch).

Baz Luhrman certainly starts off with a hyper-realistic style that is intriguing, but this very quickly degrades into a by-the-numbers play, every twist to the plot well sign-posted. This belies the talent of the acting, barring Nicole, with unsung Aussie heroes such as Bryan Brown and David Wenham in particular standing out from the crowd.

In the end, if it wasn’t for the little kid Nullah, this would be a dull epic hardly worth slogging through. Despite all this, it is after all your patriotic duty as an Australian to go watch this. ★★☆

Dostana – Now, this is how you make Priyanka Chopra look smokin’. The story here is that two guys (John Abraham and Abhishek Bachan) living in Miami have to pretend to be a gay couple to get an apartment, and they end up being housemates with The Hot Girl (Priyanka). Who they inevitably fall for, but comedy gets in the way of telling her that they’re not, etc.

Genuinely funny and not-half-bad rom-com, though inevitably overdoes the songs. ★★★★

The Namesake – well constructed and largely on-the-money portrayal of an Indian migrant family. Meera Nair directs a story that’s almost a series of viginettes that move along the timeline in jumps. Each jump is appropriate, and the tale is told with a minimum of fuss or superfulous material.

Kal Penn demonstrates his ability to act is not limited to stoners a la Harold & Kumar, and Tabu & Irfan Khan prove most excellent in the roles of the parents. A brilliant movie, but perhaps limited in its target audience. ★★★☆

Madagascar – Escape 2 Africa: Brilliant! While the first Madagascar was a bit meh, a bit by-the-numbers, it looks like the producers went back to it and said “how can we make this better?”, and they actually found the right key elements. The penguins are in fine form, as is the lemur King Julian (Sacha Baren Cohen, a.k.a. Ali G, Borat) – you get the feeling that there’s an element of ad-libbing going on to make it all the more brilliant. The main plot moves along at a tight clip, with only a little sentimentality. Good laughs make it well worth it for young and old. ★★★☆